Bloom Into You: Elaina Bellis on Motherhood and Life After Loss

Bloom Into You: Elaina Bellis on Motherhood and Life After Loss

This feature is part of our campaign, Bloom Into You, where we celebrate women who have established strong roots within themselves, planted a seed, and grew into their own. Throughout the month, we'll be featuring women we admire who have bloomed through adversity, triumph, loss, motherhood, and connecting to nature. Ready to bloom with us?

After the depths of winter, always comes the breath of spring. Flowers sprout proudly, trees dance with life, and we remember, once again, that without death and loss, there is no life and growth. Nature has a way of reminding us of these lessons quietly, and we are also grateful to know exceptional women that remind us of this truth as they bloom through adversity, loss, and triumph.

This spring, we celebrate these women in our new series, Bloom Into You. When considering the conversations ahead, we knew the perfect person to speak with first: Elaina Bellis, mama to Lincoln (7-years-old) Quincy and Rowe (6-years-old) model, and all around creative. Bellis has long inspired us with her talent, beauty, perspective and joyful family. She has also shared poignant wisdom about the loss of her son, Lincoln, and moved us with her ability to navigate grief, growth, and parenthood with grace. Her insights and vulnerability have created an emotional safe space for many, and we hope you enjoy our conversation below.

Elaina Bellis

Perelel: Did you always know you wanted to be a mother? Was there a moment that planted the seed, if you will? Or, did life just sort of happen? 

Elaina Bellis: I always knew I wanted to be a mama. Ever since I was little. I dreamt of motherhood over the wedding gown. My mom was so into babies, and that just sort of rubbed off on me too. We love kids. 

P: Our series Bloom Into You is all about sharing stories of women who have bloomed into themselves. How have you found yourself through your motherhood journey?

EB: I would say I’m learning more about who I am through my daughters and what they show me about myself—I didn’t realize was there. My triggers, my reactions, the way I move through the world, I see it all differently now through their eyes. They’re my greatest teachers.

Elaina Bellis

P: You’ve been open about sharing the loss of your son Lincoln on social media. Why did you feel like that was important to do? Did you feel like there was space to share your experience? 

EB: SO important. I am so glad I shared our story on Instagram. I felt so lost and lonely in my loss of him, and once I shared it on IG, it felt like our story allowed other women to feel safe in sharing their own stillbirth stories with me. Connecting with other women truly helped me feel not so alone. He still connects me to so many women around the world with our story. I’m so grateful for that.

 P: In doing so, what have you learned from other women in your community?

EB: To be gentle on yourself. To keep trusting that you’re so taken care of—even when you feel you aren’t, you are. Keep trusting in that. I held on tight to that.

Elaina Bellis

P: You are now a mom to two beautiful twin girls. What do you hope to teach your daughters about the strength of women?

EB: I hope to lead by example, to show them confidence and self love. To listen and trust their intuition. And to love above all—always choose love.

Elaina Bellia

P: Do you have any practices that nourish your spirit?

EB: Hot yoga, long walks, and meditation.

 P: Mother’s Day is a wonderful holiday for some but can also be a hard and difficult day for those who have experienced loss. What has been your relationship to Mother’s Day over the years? What’s one piece of advice you would give to someone grieving this Mother’s Day?

EB: Gosh, Mother’s Day is bittersweet for me. I love being with my kids, but it also brings up the loss of my mama. I think the only advice I’d offer is to allow yourself to feel whatever is coming up for you. Be gentle with yourself. Breath through it all and remember you’re not alone and that you are loved.

"Be gentle with yourself. Breath through it all and remember you’re not alone and that you are loved."

P: What has rooted you and keeps you grounded?

EB: Reading The Untethered Soul by Michael A. Singer. His words echo in my mind when I feel triggered or my ego needs to be checked.

We want to hear about your motherhood journey. Join our community, The Village, to connect with other women and find support along the way. Plus, nourish your body throughout motherhood with OB/GYN-founded vitamins for moms that support your energy, mood and beauty, too.

This article is for informational purposes only. It is not, nor is it intended to be, a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment and we recommend that you always consult with your healthcare provider. To the extent that this article features the advice of physicians or medical practitioners, the views expressed are the views of the cited expert and do not necessarily represent the views of Perelel.

Written by Jessica Lopez. Jessica Lopez is a freelance writer, digital content creator, and new mother. She has covered all lifestyle topics ranging from bridal to beauty for publications including Brides Magazine, Byrdie, THE/THIRTY, and more. Walking wide-eyed into motherhood has inspired her to connect with other parents through her writing and shared experience. You can follow more of her journey @Jessica.H.Lopez.